I'm back from Italy!

Hello there!

I arrived back from my vacation two days ago and I am already back at work.  How I wish that I had a few more days off to relax and settle back into my routine before taking off for work again!  Alas, thus is life, and I do appreciate having been able to go on a real vacation for once. 

The trip to Italy was amazing.  We flew into Milan, then spent four nights in Rome, three in Amalfi, and three in Florence before heading up to Venice to fly back to New York.  We did everything from pilgrimage-type visits to different churches in Rome including, of course, the Vatican, to taking side trips to Capri, Siena, and the Chianti wine region, and even took a day to hike the famous "Path of the Gods" on the Amalfi Coast.  It was a whirlwind full of activities, running for trains, enjoying the most wonderful pizza and pasta and seafood and steak and wine, and of course, getting my fill of gelato. 

The eighteenth was my birthday, and possibly the highlight of the trip.  We attended the Papal Audience and, thanks to a seminarian friend, were fortunate enough to end up in the special section on top of the steps where usually only bishops are allowed to sit.   It was amazing to be that close to the pope, and hear from his mouth words of encouragement and guidance. 

As for my time management book and my book about fearlessness... Well, they stayed in my backpack through the entire duration of the trip, completely accessible and completely untouched.  I did do a little bit of reading towards the end of the trip, but that was from a book about the life of St. Catherine of Siena that I picked up at the church here.  So here I am, at work, with only three days left of the month of May in which to finish up my time management reading and at least make a dent in my fearlessness book.  I think I'll stick to the small time management book for the purpose of enhancing my success ratio as I am still only in the beginning of my project.  I'll let you know in a couple of days how the reading went.  I'll also try to share some photos over the next few weeks as I work on creating enough space on my computer to upload the 1800 photos I took over the 11 days that I was in Italy. 

Here's the first of several to come.  It is a photo of our first pizza in Italy.  We discovered halfway through ordering that you can have as big or small a slice as you want because they charge you based on the weight of the pizza.  We ordered every different kind of pizza and then shared them all.  My favorites included the one with the fresh mozzarella as well as one with lots of tomato. 

5 More Days Before Vacation!

Well, I know that I've been missing days with my posts lately.  For anyone that faithfully reads my blog and notices the gaps in posting, I thank you and apologize.  Now that I've apologized, let me announce that in five days I will be going on a much needed vacation to Italy for two weeks.  I will not be taking my computer with me, so you can expect a big gap in posts.  If I have any big revelations I will try to make it to an internet cafe.  Otherwise, you can expect me to keep track in my notebook and fill you in when I get back. 

I don't feel that I really have too much to report, except that I've been trying to read about Time Management and how important it is to prioritize and not overextend yourself or set unachievable goals, while making to-do lists that include so many things that completing them all is absolutely unachievable.  So far, I've been doing alright with the juggling.  This morning I had a cup of Brazilian coffee and became incredibly focused and productive.  Great! Fabulous! I wanted to throw myself a ticker tape parade.  The downside? Where's the catch, you ask?  I am so wired and jittery now, that I might as well have stuck my fingers into the electrical socket.  Not only that, but it does also make me feel very anxious.  I know that this is a side effect from the caffeine and not a psychological issue right now, which is better than feeling it and not knowing that.  I guess that's a small price to pay for having made all the phone calls that I needed to make before leaving the country again, but it's certainly not a comfortable feeling and not something I'd want to do all the time.

Anyway, I'll try to write some more before vacation.  For now, I'm off to Barcelona!

Priorities, Divided

Let me tell you, time management is tough stuff.  For one thing, as I work with my books I've come to see that my job changes the whole system in a way.  As I look at my priorities I notice that, although studying and following up with vacation emails might be at the top of the list, when I am actually home I have to skip further down to the things on my list that I can only do if I am at home.  For example, this morning I had a very productive morning, in which I worked with my time management book, responded to emails, made phone calls, and stopped by the post office.  A couple of these things could only be done stateside, so it was imperative that I get them done.  However, I could have definitely worked on my book while on layover in Madrid tomorrow.  The result is that right now I am sitting at the airport waiting for my flight, while two laundry baskets full of clean and very rumpled clothes are sitting in my apartment getting wrinkled for want of folding, hanging, and putting away. 

It will definitely be a challenge to tame my use of time, but I anxiously await the day when I can revel in the results of this hard work and enjoy a simpler, less harried, existence.

Tic-Toc, Tic-Toc, Soon I Will Be Master of the Clock!

"The only reason for time is so that everything doesn't happen at once."

-Albert Einstein

Now that I finished reading "the Happiness Project," I started dedicating some serious energy to my studies on Time Management.  I did not get any personal recommendations for books dealing with this topic, so I decided to save some money and visit my local library.  I was pleasantly surprised and overwhelmed, all at the same time.  

Good news: They actually had quite a few books on the subject. 

Bad news: Now it was my job to choose one. 

I checked out a total of four books (after spending a few minutes trying to eliminate a few others from my stack), then stopped by the post office to pick up a package that had come while I was on a trip and found the postman locking the door.  He informed me that the post office was closed.  Then the conversation degenerated.

Postman: The post office is closed, you'll have to come back tomorrow.

Me: Seriously?  When does it close?

Postman: Five.

Me: (looking at my cell phone for the time) But it's just barely five o'clock now.

Postman: Well, we go by postal time.

Me: Look, I'm a Flight Attendant, I'm never around.  Is there any way I can just get this package?  I see that there are still other customers in there.

Postman: The post office is closed.

Me: Yeah, you mentioned that already. 

I turned to go and heard the postman mutter something like "I'm sorry," to which I could respond in no other way than by muttering, "no, you're not." 

Bad news: In my quest to find enlightenment on the subject of time management, I wasted enough time deciding what books to check out that I didn't make it to the post office before they closed.  Now I have to make another trip.  I think my sister would call this an "epic fail" on my part. 

Good news: I don't think the postman heard me mutter my last comment (which, once I'd calmed down, I was mortified at myself for even allowing to escape my lips) and I managed not to get myself arrested for harassing a government employee. 

I calmed myself down by venting at my boyfriend in the middle of Game Stop (and in the process frightened the poor girl that works there, oops) and then stopping by the ice cream truck to get a chocolate custard cone with chocolate sprinkles.  The bf got vanilla custard with cherry coating.  Of course, I had to taste it.  I decided that the cherry coating tastes like wax, which strengthens my conviction that there is nothing in the world as wonderful as chocolate.  

Since that whole episode, I have started reading two of the books.  Yes, simultaneously.  The first one I opened, for no other reason than it being small enough to fit in my purse, is entitled "Manage Your Time to Reduce Your Stress" by Rita Emmett.  She apparently also wrote a book called "The Procrastinator's Handbook," which I should probably buy and laminate and read like the bible.  As far as I can tell from the little progress I've made with this book, it deals a lot with the topic of stress and less with the topic of time management.  Then again, I am still reading the first chapter which deals exclusively with "getting control of that stress."

The second book I started working with, which I think will be the main one of the two books, is called "the Everything Time Management Book," by Bob Adams.  I generally don't like serial "do it yourself" types of books (e.g. the dummies books); however, I own two books from this "everything" label that deal with being a bridesmaid, and have found them to be quite comprehensive.  So far, I like this book a lot.  It starts by making you focus on what kind of relationship you have with time and why.  I think it's a great place to start; in a way it is like going to a doctor that finds the root cause of your symptoms rather than treating them all individually.  

I would write more about what I've learned so far, but it is quite late and I have to get up early tomorrow to go to the post office before going to work.  Now that I am studying and honing my time management skills, I would not want to start the day off so late that the expectation to finish everything that I'd like to do tomorrow becomes unrealistic.  

Good night, world!

Energizer Bunny Brain

What do you do when your brain is full of thoughts and plans and logistics and you just can't get it to stop long enough to fall asleep?  I've never had sleep issues before but, lately, I've been so wound up and excited about the things that I am doing that I can't get my brain to stop.

Like now, it's almost midnight, I have to be up in seven hours, and I am wide awake.  It's not that I am trying to stay awake, but I'll turn the lights out, lie in bed, ponder what's happened throughout the day, and then I'll get an idea.  "Oh! How didn't I think of doing it this way?  I could alter it and do it another way.  I wonder if so and so thought of such and such?" And so, my brain keeps going.  Then, I'll have an epiphany about something that I've been struggling to resolve all day long.  Well, once that happens, I have to turn the light on again so I can write it down because I am terrified that I'll finally fall asleep and then wake up and not be able to remember what it was that I thought of while I couldn't sleep. 

Does anyone else struggle with this?  What do you do when this happens?

Now, I am turning the lights out and I'll just hope to wake up to some good advice in the morning.
Night, night, friends.

"The Happiness Project:" Reflections

Yay! I have completed the first official step of my plan.  I have finished reading Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project.  As I outlined in my plan for the year, here is a mix of thoughts that I got out of reading the book. 

First of all, her project, though different in focus than mine, is at the heart of what I am doing and at the heart of what every human being aspires for: Happiness.  Gretchen Rubin explains in the beginning of the book that she was on a city bus when she realized that she was not focusing on the things that matter most in life and that time doesn't stop ticking for anyone to catch up.  So, she dedicated a year to her 'happiness project:' a search for the nature of happiness and the practical application of resolutions that would bring more happiness into her life.  She focused on a different area of her life each month and set resolutions for herself to become a better and happier person.  In the book, she recounts her journey and elaborates on what she discovered during that year. 

Here are some of the things that I underlined as I read and why they made me think:

• "You manage what you measure."  What an excellent point.  I've made resolutions and set goals on countless occasions and now I can't even remember what they were.  Gretchen states in her book that her resolution chart, with which she kept track of her success in keeping resolutions, was key to her overall success in her happiness project.  I think that I will somehow incorporate a resolution chart into my daily life, to keep track of things that matter but that I am not naturally inclined to do.  Heck! Just keeping track of how many desserts I eat would probably have a tremendous effect on my life.  

• "To be happy, I need to think about feeling good, feeling bad, and feeling right, in an atmosphere of growth."  This is what Gretchen calls her "first splendid truth" and I can see why.  She really has captured the essence of happiness in this statement. 

• "'Feeling right'... was the feeling that I'm living the life I'm supposed to lead... 'Feeling right' is about living the life that is right for you." This is something that I need to learn.  I am one of those "nice" people that want to please the people they care about.  I know that anyone who knows me is probably thinking that this is only true once you get past my stubbornness, but the truth is that when someone I care about deeply says something important, it is very hard for me to go against that.  With this journey that I am embarking on, I aim to find out what is right for me in the depths of my soul and the confines of my mind.  I am sure that the advice that I've received from my loved ones is very close and fits very well with my personal nature, but at some point you have to take what others tell you and then go deeper into yourself to find out how that resounds with what you know but maybe can't verbalize. 

• "It turns out that the happy outperform the less happy." Another thing Gretchen mentioned (I can't remember where exactly to quote it) is that people who donate time and money to charity tend to be more successful and make more money than people who do not get involved in charity.  Moreover, making others happy generally makes us happy.  So, with this giant vicious circle of benevolence and success and happiness, what is stopping us all from taking stock of our lives?

• "I'd decided to do what I wanted to do, and I ignored options that, no matter how enticing they might be for other people, weren't right for me." Ding, ding, ding! The fact that Gretchen used to clerk for Supreme Court Justice Sandra Day-O'Connor and then decided that she really wanted to shift her career and become an author absolutely encourages me in what I am doing!

• A quote from Herman Hesse: "Happiness is a how; not a what.  A talent, not an object." This reminds me of my post on attitude.  It really is so true!

• A quote from a comment that Gretchen received on her blog: "Knowing what you admire in others is a wonderful mirror into your deepest, as yet unborn, self."  This person was explaining that the qualities that you admire in others are qualities that are part of you but that you have not yet developed.  It's tremendously encouraging to think that all those qualities that you look up to others for possessing are already within you just waiting for you to tend to them and develop them in your life!

• A quote from St. Therese of Lisieux: "Love proves itself by deeds, so how am I to show my love?  Great deeds are forbidden me.   The only way I can prove my love is by... every little sacrifice, every glance and word, and the doing of the least actions for love."  I love St. Therese!  How can you not be inspired by a young girl who possessed so much wisdom?  I don't know yet if the deeds that I will do in my lifetime will be great or small, but knowing that Therese became a saint through such small deeds gives me hope that no matter what the size of deeds I am destined to do, I can make a difference and inspire others. 

• A quote from G. K. Chesterton: "It is easy to be heavy: hard to be light." So thought-provoking.

• "The belief that unhappiness is selfless and happiness is selfish is misguided.  It's more selfless to act happy.  It takes energy, generosity, and discipline to be unfailingly lighthearted, yet everyone takes the happy person for granted."  I've never really thought of trying to be happy as a selfish thing to do, but I didn't think of it as a selfless thing to do either.  Reading this statement really made me appreciate so much more those people that I encounter that are happy all the time, and made me want to emulate that disposition.

• "The satisfaction gained from the achievement of a large undertaking is one of the most substantial that life affords."  And so, I set out on a year-long project full of deadlines that I know will challenge me every day. 

• "I needed to accept my own nature-yet I needed to push myself as well.  This seemed contradictory, but in my heart, I knew the difference between lack of interest and fear of failure."  Fear of failure can destroy your biggest accomplishments before you even undertake them.  This is not something that I want to allow to dominate my life.  I want to be like the Rockefeller family, whose members I've heard are not afraid of trying anything they set their minds to.   I want to be true to myself, develop and utilize the talents that God gave me, and find and do whatever it is that I feel I am meant to do.

• "I've read repeatedly that it takes twenty-one days to form a habit, but in my experience that just isn't true."  This struck me because I did not know there was a scientific conclusion about how long it takes to form a habit.  Even though it didn't really work for Gretchen with her food diary, I hope that it will give me a good frame of reference for when I set a resolution that I want to turn into a habit, and I hope that the science will hold true in my case. 

• "The feeling of control is an essential element of happiness-a better predictor of happiness than, say, income.  Having a feeling of autonomy, of being able to choose what happens in your life or how you spend your time, is crucial."  This is interesting because I am already in such tight control of so many aspects of my life that I am now seeking to find the right balance in finding what to exercise control over and what to relax about.  Then again, I suppose I am now talking about controlling what I control, so maybe she is right. 

• "You hit a goal, you keep a resolution... With resolutions, the expectations are different.  Each day I try to live up to my resolutions.  Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I fail, but every day is a clean slate and a fresh opportunity."  Basically, you can fail at a goal and that's it, you failed.  With a resolution, there is new hope every day.  

• "The days are long, but the years are short."  I think Gretchen would now agree with me in adding that this is only true if you allow it to be so.

• "You're not happy unless you think you're happy."  It's all in our minds.  

• "Best is good, better is best."  So stop being such a perfectionist! (That goes for me more than anyone else, most likely).

• "Outer order contributes to inner calm."  Ah, something I always aspire to achieve and usually stress out about failing miserably with.  I'm wondering when I'll have a day when I don't have four million things to do other than organizing my space.  Gretchen, do you want to come clean my closet?

• "Happiness comes not from having more, not from having less, but from wanting what you have."  I'd have to admit that I want what I have to a large degree, but I still want more and want less in different areas of my life.  Mostly, I want this search that I am doing now, and that, I can confidently say, I have.  

• "You can choose what you do, but you can't choose what you like to do."  So, time to get my head out of the clouds because, realistically, I do not want the responsibility, stress, criticism, and lack of freedom that comes with the job of being the president of the United States.  Yes, for those of you who do not know me, my dream when I was in middle school and even high school was to become the first female US president.  Aside from the fact that I'm sure that, even if I went full steam ahead in that direction, someone would surely beat me to it, I now realize that I would not actually enjoy being in that position.

 Am I happy?  Am I in control of my life?  Am I doing what is right for me?  Gretchen Rubin's book really does address anything you could think of that surrounds the concept and reality of happiness.  It is very easy to read and relate to.  It is impossible to walk away from without gathering some new perspective on your own life.  The book helped me understand the nature of my search and the importance that my own personal journey has in my present life as well as for my future.  It is not a career book, which is great because it will make you think of all the different aspects of your life.  However, if you think you are in the wrong career, or the wrong job in the right career, or the right job at the right time but that something else needs to come after this job, Gretchen Rubin's book will also have an invaluable amount of wisdom for you because she has made the shift in her own life and, more importantly, because any shift in your career will have a direct effect on your happiness. 

Mostly, I think what I learned from "The Happiness Project" is to trust my instincts and to keep track of my progress.  Did you read the book?  Do you have any thoughts along these lines?  I'd love to read any comments you might have!

Crunch time

Well, crunch time has officially begun.  I have two weeks to finish planning a vacation, including the part where we find places to stay.  Funny thing about that... the longer you debate where to stay, the more likely it is that someone else will book the room before you get a chance to.  Yes, it's getting a little hectic, and by the time we're done planning I'll definitely be in dire need of a vacation.  I also have to somehow scour my apartment to find my extra camera battery, or decide in the next day or so to just buy another one.  Then, I also have to go through about 12,000 photos on my computer and delete duplicates or fuzzy photos so that I actually have space on my computer to save more photos after my vacation.  On top of that I have a month's worth of flying crammed into two weeks, three books on time management to work with, and one book to just read through. 

That's the bad news.  The good news is that if I get through these two weeks without any major incidents (and I am confident that I can), I'll have a beautiful two week vacation ahead of me to enjoy and I'll know that I can make it through any other crunch time I encounter after that.  And with that, I am off to work!

Day 1 - Just go do it, but recognize when to stop.

Today, or rather yesterday as of one hour and eighteen minutes ago, marks the beginning of my year long project to find where my path in life is leading me.  The day started at 4:00am after getting only about four hours of sleep.  I worked a full day, tried to go to church but missed Mass because my flight landed too late, then ran some errands and finally tried to get some of the four thousand things done that I need to do to prepare for various things (such as my upcoming vacation). 

The truth of the matter is that I am exhausted to the point where my body is shutting down and, wish as I might, there is no way that I can continue with any of the items on my to-do list at the moment.  Therefore, just as a few days ago I came up with a resolution to think less about certain things that I know I need to do and just do them, now I come to the realization that the other side of that coin means knowing when to pause, stop, but things down, and just relax. 

With that, I am going to sleep.
Over and out. :o)